All I need to know I learned in Barbados...

Ok, so I didn't learn EVERYthing I need to know in Barbados, however I did learn a lot. And some of the lessons I was privileged to learn I did so only because I was in Barbados, yet others I think would have come from my first week as a married woman, no matter where we were geographically on the globe. Regardless, here they are, in no particular order:

* Close all doors and windows to keep lizards, crabs, cats, and monkeys outside; otherwise you might find yourself sleeping with any one (or all) of them.

* Based on results, saltwater from the ocean (namely, the Caribbean Sea) does indeed compromise the effectiveness of the SPF in sunscreen.

* "Old married folk" now has a sense of realism to it that rivals images of our parents' "early" bedtimes. Once the wedding rings were placed on our fingers, we've had a terrible time keeping our eyes open past 9p. Besides the wedding night and our days/nights of travel to and from Barbados it's been like clockwork: the clock strikes 8:30p and one of us begins the yawning ceremonies which inevitably lead us to bed within the next hour.
(Sidebar: this lesson hasn't been true this week as I've had to go to bed without my husband by my side since he's working--I'm so unmotivated to climb into a big bed without him, even if I'm completely exhausted. Tonight Sleepytime Tea is supporting me in aiming for bed earlier than 2a . . .)

* There is something so intimately sweet and spiritually invigorating to see a man proudly wear (and show off) his wedding ring. When Raleigh so carefully slides it on his finger (or when I catch him happily "checking it out" on his hand), I can't help but smile . . .

* Jellyfish sting. Even the little ones.

* There is something so satisfying in achieving a goal, it cannot be expressed in words. Seeing the sunset from the very water from which the sun will fall behind, sea kayaking, getting another stamp in the passport . . . priceless.

* For some people, naked is a viable wardrobe option.

* For the Barbadians, the posted occupancy limit on a public bus is only a suggested minimum. In fact, it appears such limit only encourages the driver to at least double what is written on the sign.

* Rain is indeed "liquid sunshine" and brightens all that is visible when the clouds aren't releasing their store. It is as much a gift from God as the sunshine.

* It's not real until it's real. I've been practicing writing "Kimberly Elstun" for well over a year, yet I still sometimes forget to sign that way. I guess I'll just have to keep practicing . . . :)

* One of the first times my husband had to "rescue" me was in Half Moon Fort, St. Lucy; and there, we learned that he is great at gecko-herding.

* Although extremely attractive all the time, I think Raleigh is most handsome when he is sleeping, or in that very sleepy, only half-awake state. And I secretly hope that if I feel this way about him, he feels the same about me and uncurled hair and no make-up.

* The "Reggae Bus" with its blaring music, wild drive patterns, and co-pilot pouring shots for all the passengers is just not for us. Guess we're not as "hip" and as "cool" as the young Barbadians.

* I STILL love how he holds my hand, caresses my arm, or gently pulls the hair away from my face with his hand. And although nothing is physically different in those actions since April 10th, something is different. And I hope it never gets old.

Mr. and Mrs. and Now What?!

Ok so the big day has come and gone. Months of planning and figuring and organizing and more planning and more figuring and organizing . . . aaaaand we're done. Mr. and Mrs. Elstun at last; we're married! :)

It feels soooooooo great, I am not able to adequately explain it. To finally have my best friend as my husband, my partner for life, my one and only forever--announced before man and blessed by God--is AWESOME. I keep attempting to sort the feelings running through my heart and the thoughts running through my head in order to put them together in a way that can give some semblance of how exactly to describe the experience of being Mrs. Kimberly Elstun (and more so, what that means to me), however I keep coming up short. Instead, I'll share some of my biggest thoughts and memories of my wedding day; perhaps that will at least give a peek into the joyful exuberance I am feeling . . .

All in all, it was perfect. There were plenty of speed bumps to cross, don't get me wrong, however with the support system Raleigh and I had in place, those speed bumps were barely felt and even the larger obstacles that popped up during the day didn't dampen our spirit. I can only imagine that April 10, 2010 was exactly as God had orchestrated, as it was everything we'd hoped it would be and more.

The sky was beautifully blue, and the sun was shining bright. Roads remained dry, so travel into the snow-capped mountains was pleasant and peaceful. I felt the most beautiful I have ever felt, and was totally loved and cared for by the amazing women who surrounded me and cared for me that day. I was late for my ceremony (yes, I know--ME, the planner and always-early-one!) but it didn't matter as the wedding didn't get started until I showed up anyways, and the music that was resonating within the walls of the church kept all smiling through to the start (and beyond) anyways. :)

I remember seeing all the faces of family and dear friends, smiling back at me as I made my way into the church, so happy to share this wonderful celebration with us. I remember the look in Raleigh's eyes as I walked down the aisle towards him, and how everything else around us seemed to blur away into a foggy mist. I remember the kiss from my father as he handed me to my future husband, the warmth from his lips resonating on my cheek just long enough to produce a tear (or two). I remember so clearly how Raleigh worked through his tears to say his vows (I totally picked up on the inflection of his voice when he said, "I will love you . . ."), and how he so lovingly handed me back my once-dry-but-now-snot-filled hankie after I handed it to him to dry his eyes. I remember how the sun would shine through the stained glass windows in the church at various times throughout the ceremony, producing a beautiful rainbow affect in the rays of light that shone into the room. I remember signing my name--Kimberly N. Elstun--for the first time on our marriage license placed on the altar, and how electric our first kiss as husband and wife was, tingling our lips with an icy heat that I look forward to recreate everyday. I remember how Alex, Andy, and Gerry jumped into the refrain of Matthew West's "More" with a contagious enthusiasm that bounced in our hearts as we joyfully walked down the aisle arm in arm as Mr. and Mrs. Elstun. ("I love you more . . .")

Fr. Matt did an AWESOME job officiating. The homily was one that spoke directly to both Raleigh and I, and we will most certainly forever remember the words that touched our hearts so deeply. He spoke of the "rocks" upon which we have chosen to build our lives (we were engaged on a rock at the Grand Canyon, were married at the Chapel on the Rock, and are building our family on the "rock" of our faith in Christ and His church), and so beautifully incorporated the gospel reading of the wise man. It's true we want the strongest foundation possible, found only in our Lord.

All these wonderful memories make me smile, even now, and by far outweigh the less-than-great things that snuck into our day, not even worth mentioning now. Point is, it was all wonderful and the day turned out exactly as it should. And we're married now, Raleigh and I. Husband and wife, partners in life, now and forever. Our relationship has definitely changed, as there is now a holy spirit that intertwines us both, divinely raising us up to a higher, more sacred union. Not that he (Raleigh) loved me any less before we were married, but it's different now. And I like it. A lot.

And now, as we begin our married lives together, I think, how much more wonderful can this get? Now what?!

The most exciting part is, I know He has much in store, and it's only the beginning . . .

Seven Days and Counting

So one week from today, Raleigh and I will be getting married! Hooray!

It's so hard to believe that the time has finally arrived. I mean, we've been engaged since forever (18 months) and just the thought of ME finally getting married seems so surreal. I've been to dozens of weddings throughout my 27 years, have thought about my big day since childhood, have been planning for and talking about this day for months and months . . . All of this for so long and yet in seven short days from today, it will be my time.

It will be ME getting fussed over by my girls, ME slipping into the beautiful white dress, ME walking down the aisle to joyful music, ME being the center of attention (with Raleigh of course) and the lone draw for the event. It's crazy to think that it is my time. I think back to just before I reconnected with Raleigh, and laugh at how sure I was this day would never happen. Weddings almost made me sad back then--they were a reminder that I didn't have anyone I loved that much, in that way; that I was so far "behind" all my friends and cousins that were of the same age and madly in love; that my conviction to my faith and my values over the years before may have cost me something greater than I could explain (at least that was my fear). And yet, one day it happened--I fell in love with the person I least expected to--and now am getting married. It's true--time really does fly! If I could go back in time and tell myself anything, I'd say "Be patient, and continue on. It WILL happen. Keep faith. And most importantly, DO NOT SETTLE--because sweetie, a really awesome man is on his way to you and you have to be ready to welcome him into your heart . . . " Not that my advice to myself would change anything (I did exactly as I would have suggested), however encouragement (and a little bit of renewed confidence in those affirmations) in low times would have been nice. Oh well, right?! I'm seven days away from saying "yes" to forever with the man of my dreams, and it all seems so right.

Ok so push the forward button, and at this time next week, he'll probably be still in bed (SO not unusual). I'll have already had breakfast with my best friend and will be at the hair salon, watching my girls get their hair done and chatting about the day's events. We'll be within hours of me walking down the aisle, becoming Mrs. Kimberly Elstun, and then celebrating with friends and family from both near and far.

I'm most excited I think for the quiet moments . . . how blue the sky will be and how pretty the sun will sparkle off the mountain snow, how my surprise flowers look against my dress, how my sweet cousin will toss the flower petals as she walks, how Raleigh's face will look like as I begin my walk to the altar, how his eyes will sparkle as he blinks back tears and says his vows (I'm not expecting a dry ceremony on either of our parts), that first car ride together as husband and wife as we're driven from the church to the reception, the fun behind our first dance and ice cream cake, and then finally closing the door behind us in the hotel at the end of the night . . .

Seven days and counting; it's nearly our time!