My Time Will Come

Ever have those moments where you're extremely happy for someone you care about, are excited they're getting exactly what they want, and wholeheartedly know that they're worth every ounce of the joy they're experiencing . . . yet are a tad bit sad (and jealous even) that you're not in their shoes, experiencing those same great feelings in your life? Well, I think I've found myself there today as my dearest friend has found herself floating on the highest cloud with a sweet man who treats her well and at this point, is a Prince Charming through and through. And here I sit in my own fog of bewilderment and ambiguity, watching in awe and excitement as she floats above me, and wondering when my time will come to soar high? And even though I ask this question, I truly believe (and know that I know) I know the answer. My time will come when it is meant to come. I may not have an exact date written down in the books (as I prefer them to be--I'm such an analyst), however usually things don't work out that way. Look at my dear friend, Debbie, for example . . . she wasn't anticipating anything and then WHAM! she flew into the sky quicker than anyone might think. It was practically overnight. So that leads me to consider my life, and realize the possibility of something amazing happening tomorrow is great. And if tomorrow is not the day, the next day might be, or even the day after that . . . as I told Debbie (I'm so smart), there is no set timeline for these things. Right?

So knowing all this, why do I let my mind take me to that place of sadness and jealously (even though it's minute and short-lived), where it seems there is no hope? I know that is as far from the truth as possible, so it's silly to even go there. My best guess is that these feelings mean one thing--I am human. And for that I am grateful. Feelings such as this verify that I am alive and am a wonderful, active, strong being that is truly LIVING my life, and EXPERIENCING all life has to offer. I have more than just an inkling that it's times like these that make the floating-high-in-the-sky moments so amazing. After all, how would we know to appreciate the light of the sun if we didn't ever experience the darkness of night?

And no matter how dark the sky may be, in my world there are bright stars sparkling overhead. Perhaps they've been placed there to remind me just how blessed I am . . . in good times and the even better times to come.

Yes. My time will come. I am sure of it. :)

Back on track and ahead full steam!

Alrighty . . . I'm ready to leave the dark gloom of last week in the past and look forward to the bright and sunny days ahead. I don't know what may be in front of me, however I do know that it's my choice to have fun with whatever (and whoever) comes my way. 2006 is still my year . . . I can feel it . . . and I have no doubt I'm going to create some amazing things. After all, the first month and a half have already brought me more than I had hoped, and I've proven time and time again nothing will slow me down. I AM a brilliant, loveable, SEXY woman enthusiastically accepting my greatness now, and nothing--I repeat NOTHING--changes that!!

All this pink and red is turning me GREEN . . .

Ok, so Valentine's Day is right around the corner . . . less than a week to be exact. And quite frankly, I'm already sick of it. Although I'm not into commercialized holidays anyways, this one is especially annoying, especially this year and I think I know why.
First of all, it's the one day day of the year where singles are singled out and sometimes ostracized even, simply because they have not found the relationship worthy of them yet or have, in some cases, for whatever reason chosen to remain single. It doesn't seem fair or very friendly. Talk about lack of brotherly love out there. Secondly, it seems to me that females in particular start to act very strange around this time of the year, as they seem to await some amazing gift or some thoughtful comment from their significant other that they hope will spin their life around and make them float even higher on the already high cloud they're sitting on. Now I don't want to be a grinch about all of this (although he is green, too), however I want to know why it isn't possible to celebrate the love between couples each and every day of the year? Why do we have to set up a special holiday for such a time, when it seems to me that the union between two persons can and should be recognized more frequently than once a year? And for those who know me best, I think those little gifts and thoughtful comments should be exchanged more often, too. Does this make sense?
I understand perhaps I feel so strongly about all of this right now because I am single this year and don't have anyone in particular to put in a little effort to make the day a special one for me, however I'm not asking for that. I want a special person in my life the other 364 days, too, and look forward to the day when each of those days will hold as much significance for me as February 14th now holds for so many others. Until then, though, I guess Tuesday will just be another day. And have fun, I will. :)

Movin' and a Shakin'

So things have been all over the place in my world lately, which is a sign that above all, I'm alive. :) Between the crazyness I've been experiencing at work, the roller coaster I've been on regarding my personal relationships, reconnecting with old friends, and the fun I've had with loved ones celebrating birthdays and eating ice cream (yes, I do celebrate for the special event of eating ice cream) . . . things have been "Whoo-Busy!!" That's ok, though, because great things are definitely happening as a result of the chaos. For example, I was named Staff of the Quarter at work, was given a raise in pay, have had a blast with Debbie doing this and that and eveything in between, am growing in the relationship arena and learning tons, am working out on a regular basis and am getting closer and closer to my physical goals for the year, and am taking the time I need to spend time with myself and nurture the goddess within. :) And on top of that, I'm preparing for a self-esteem and leadership seminar for kids which I will be chiefing (in other words, I'm the leader) in April. So the busy fun continues . . .

That's about it for now, although I'm sure there's more to come!! Here we go . . .

Catch and Release Program in Works

Ok, so I know it's been some time since I last blogged (not as long as Debbie, mind you! ), although things have been very busy in my world lately. Here's the latest:

First off, work has been crazy. Jaime is now in Georgia, dossiers keep coming in quicker than they're going out, more families are signing up for the compilation service we provide, and we're just about to embark on a singles and high-risk adoption hand-holding campaign. All of this means more work and I'm sure, longer hours at the office. I love what I do (thank goodness for that), so that's not an issue . . . it's just going to be a matter of keeping things caught up in the office while taking the much needed time for myself on evenings and weekends. I know I can do it, though. As I said before, bring it on! :)

In my personal life, Mr. Gem is again taking a back seat in my bus. I'm not sure if he's just riding until we get to the next stop, where he wants off, or if he plans to stay around awhile and head towards Happily Ever After with me. I'm not waiting for him to make up his mind, though . . . I'm still trucking along at a pretty good pace. No matter what, I do enjoy his company, so I do hope he can keep up--even if it is only on a friendship level. And since he left for a week-long trip to Hawaii today and other opportunities are anxiously awaiting at the door of my bus for a passenger ticket, I've decided to release my energy from him and let him go his way. Kim's "Catch and Release Program" is officially in the works. Mr. Gem "caught" me once before, and am sure if he wants to make our relationship more than it is, he'll do what he needs to in order to "catch" me again.

And as the program gains speed, I've been perfecting my own hunting skills. I think the cliche is right--practice makes perfect--and if I do say so myself, despite my novice title, I have quickly become quite good. The power of intention is strong and I fully put it to use the other night when Debbie and I went out for fun. Stampede Boy was "sucked in" by my eyes, as he says, and is so far, quite a gentleman. I let him on the bus and just today, gave him a seat of his own. We'll just have to see if he chooses to stay there and as time goes on, if I choose to let him. Perhaps this is the relationship that I've been waiting for, perhaps not . . . either way, I'm enjoying the ride while he's here. :)

Ok, well I think that's it for now . . . although sometime soon there might be more to share. So stay tuned . . . and buckle up tight! :)

2006, Bring it On!

Happy New Year!

I'm not going to be writing tons and tons in this entry as there's just so much to do and only one year to do it in! Ha! :) I've got my list of goals and things I WILL be accomplishing this year, and I know with the team of support I have around me (Mom, Dad, Bryan, Debbie, Scott, Brian, Megan, Al, Connie, Izzy, Debberoo, Sean . . . the list goes on and on), I'll be finishing them up quicker than I think and heading onto even bigger and better things! And although I'm not quite sure what the year will look like yet, I know it's going to be GREAT!

Here's a quick (and partial ) list in no particular order of what I'm expecting to create in 2006:

*A #10 relationship with the man of my dreams . . . a passionate, giving, courageous, financially stable, emotionally available, kind, caring, supportive man who finds me as worthy as I know I am and continues to grow and improve himself as well
*A promotion in my career . . . coupled with a raise in salary and offical title change
*An even stronger and healthier body . . . with a flat tummy and more toned biceps/triceps and thighs
*#10 relationships with all of my friends and family . . . nurturing and building what I already have so that they know exactly how much they mean to me all of the time

So . . . there's a sneak preview for what's coming up this year. I'm sure as time goes by, I'll be adding even more to my list as I'm not one to ever stop living, learning, or loving. I always say that I'm never going to be a "grown up," because that would imply that I'm done growing, which is just silly to think about. Not growing is pretty much the same thing as dying (as there is no real "static" state out there--you're either walking forward or standing still, which in essence is really taking steps backwards) and I don't plan to be dying any time soon.

So bring it on, 2006! I'm ready for you! :)

Hold tight to see what's in store . . . this is going to be one FUN ride!

Wrapping up 2005, with a pretty bow and all . . .

My Dearest Friends and Family,

Hasn't this year just flown by? In my part of the world it definitely has--it seems like just yesterday I was anxiously awaiting the arrival of 2005, excited to see what great things the year would bring. Now here we are, just a few blinks away from 2006, and as I look back over the past 12 months I can see that my intention was clear: I created much this past year and made many wonderful changes in my life. I was going to send this letter out via regular mail (inside beautiful Christmas cards, of course), however since I'm obviously not going to make it before the holiday arrives (and I'm lacking a physical address for many of you anyway), I thought I'd send my update by email, thereby saving time . . . and a tree or two. : ) That being said, here's a recap of my incredible year. . .

January--The year started off well, as I was determined to make 2005 as wonderful as I know I can. I continued working hard as a Dossier Specialist with Chinese Children Adoption International (CCAI) in Centennial, CO and assist families as they complete the paperwork (their "dossier") needed to adopt from China. I also did my part to help my dad work on finishing the basement at home; after several meetings with all four Malsom expert architects, we set the studs, framed the rooms, and hung countless sheets of drywall. Dad was sure to point out that the hot tub and home theater would be added only AFTER I left the house, so despite great plans, construction slowed and is slated to be finished in 2006. : )

February--It was about this time that I started to get the itch to spread my wings and get a place of my own. My dear friend Anthony Monaco so graciously accepted my request to be my realtor and without a single hesitation (that he admitted to anyway) he jumped right in and got to work, beginning the search for the perfect place for me to call home. At about mid-month I headed up to sunny California to attend PSI Seminar's Life Success Course in Clearlake Oaks. I had a great time and learned tons. Not only that, however I made several new friends, most of which I have no doubt I'll have for the rest of my life.

March--So after what seemed to be several weeks of a pointless search, Anthony and I finally found the place that made me smile from ear to ear and that (as he said it would), just "felt right." It is a 1002 sq. ft. condo in Southeast Aurora that has all I was looking for--2 bedrooms, a garage, a beautiful view (I'm not a big fan of noisy alley ways or strip mall parking lots), and my favorite part--a short commute to work (I'm now in the car for only about 20 minutes every morning instead of 1 hour and 10 minutes or so). I closed on the property on March 31st and have been smiling ever since. (And yes, since I do have a spare bedroom, feel free to visit anytime. And if anyone needs an EXCELLENT realtor who'll do anything and everything in his power to get you in the place you want, contact Anthony--he's the BEST!)

April-May--So much happened in these two months it's tough to keep track of what happened when. Let's see . . . I fully engaged myself in a 90-day coaching program to support me in achieving many goals I had set for myself, boosting myself forward in my life much quicker than I previously thought possible. In a mere 90 days I learned to speak conversational Mandarin Chinese, increased my monthly income (I earned an unprecedented 3 raises during this time period), learned to be stronger than my fear of spiders (I held a tarantula for over 15 continuous seconds--twice!), started taking belly dancing lessons, and trained like a maniac for a triathlon in June. Also during this time we celebrated as a family as Bryan graduated from Parks College with his Associates Degree in Criminal Justice and Applied Science and shortly thereafter turned 20! (Yes, my baby brother is in his twenties now--I suddenly feel so old! : ) )

June--In June my coaching program officially came to an end and me and my teammates celebrated by toasting at midnight with champagne . . . it was such a momentous occasion in many ways it was even better than New Years! : ) Then, on June 12th I did what I've wanted to do for quite some time (and had been preparing for for months)--I participated in the My Way or the Tri Way Triathlon! I chose to swim-run-bike, and after 800 yards of swimming, 4 miles of running, and 15 miles of biking (up much more than just "moderate hills" I might say), I finished the race and placed 4th in my age group! Hooray for me! It was a feat I worked hard for and won't soon forget, let me tell you! I'm proud to say I've been staying active since then as well, and have enjoyed the extra energy and confidence my exercise routine has given me. (Anybody want to complete a duathlon, triathlon, or marathon with me next year?) : )

July--Over the first few weeks I traveled to Destin, Florida with several of my close friends to celebrate my buddy Debbie's 30th birthday. We enjoyed the summer sun as we laid on the white sand beaches, played in the ocean, and watched fireworks crackle overhead. It was awesome. July also held 2 other grand nights of celebration . . . one was my graduation from the coaching program (this is the grand party at which I got to don the beautiful chocolate-colored evening gown since nicknamed my "J-Lo" dress) and the other was my 23rd birthday (no worries, no evening gown here--just a simple sun dress, lots of friends, and a fun night out on the town!). As you can tell, July was one crazy month that was tons of fun!

August--The year took a turn in August as my dad's sister Ardell became very ill and eventually passed away. I was in California attending a leadership seminar at the time, which only made the news of my aunt's passing that much more difficult. Still, I found support with the sisters I was with and eagerly returned home to be with my family. I also took on some new job duties at CCAI during this time as well as a couple of the girls in my office decided to go back to school. I picked up the slack and continued doing the work that I love so much.

September--Dad gave us all a great scare at this time as he was suddenly hospitalized for a staph infection in his leg we didn't even know he had. He had emergency surgery to remove the infection and after a whole month of recovery at home (as much as he begged us, we wouldn't let him go back to work so soon), he healed well and is now 100 back to himself. : )

October--After hitting my last water-skiing run for the season (it was super-chilly yet the water was as smooth as glass!), I practiced my espanol and actually was a Spanish interpreter for the 4-day PSI Basic Seminar here in Denver. I doubted my abilities at first (it's been a couple years since I spoke Spanish on more than just a conversational basis) however at the end of the seminar the man I was translating for said that he had met his "beautiful sister" during the class, said that I was a "gift" to him, and brought tears to my eyes with his kind words and genuine hug of gratitude. It was another experience through which I was able to learn and grow and will hold close to my heart forever. Another grand occasion occurred in the middle of the month when I was accused of stealing a car! Although it was a mistake on the accuser's part, the police from 3 different cities became involved and I had to file a harassment report to document the threats I was receiving. It was much more drama than I ever prefer to handle, although in the end it all worked out and now, the story provides many giggles at the absurdity of it all. (Dad found it all so unbelievable at the time he said it'd make a good movie plot! If that's the case, I prefer not to star in the sequel!)

November--I finally got around to painting my living room the color I envisioned when I moved in . . . red! It's so beautiful! All I need are a couple accent pillows for the couch and then I'll be set! (I'd send you some pics however, what leverage would I then have to encourage you to come and visit me?!) : ) I also continue to volunteer with the Adoption Exchange and in November, I helped with their Annual Fantasy Ball. I got to get all dolled up again, meet John O'Hurley, and most importantly, help raise money for the kiddos in foster care the Adoption Exchange provides recruitment services for. As usual, I had a blast.

December--And now . . . well . . . work has intensified a bit as a few really difficult cases have come across my desk recently. One resulted in a closed file (trust me, that was by far the hardest phone call I have ever had to make) and the other is still pending, although it doesn't look good. These cases in particular were definitely challenging and really stretched me both professionally and personally as I was given the opportunity to maintain integrity and stand up for what I know to be right, even when caving in or looking the other way would be much easier. I've found that the largest challenges often lead to the biggest rewards and I believe in my heart that these cases are examples of that. One bright highlight so far was presenting twins to a family earlier in the month! Talk about a rush of emotion . . . it was twice what it normally is! : )

Okay, well I guess that about wraps 2005 up for me. 2006 looks to be a great year as well, and is sure to be a blast. I already have several items on my "will-do" list including jello wrestling, climbing a 14er, participating in the Muddy Buddy race (www.muddybuddy.com), and traveling to China with my aunt and uncle as they welcome a baby baby girl into our family. I look forward to seeing each of you very soon and if not, would LOVE to at least hear from you.

With love,
~Kim